my aspiration

i stare at you from across the distance
wondering, wishing for that day
when our eyes would meet
and in your soft browns
you'd see, just how you are truly meant for me.

(parang text quote!wtf?!)

Unfamilliar Someone

crush. infatuation. God knows.
I fell for your smile and your inexplicable ways.
I cant describe the sudden thrill that came to my essence.
when our bodies moved; lost in the sensation of imprudence.
loud music. a crowded place. people intoxicated from too much alcohol.
yeah, i know. you are just another stranger I dance with for the night.
comes in the bright daylight and half of the faces I met i cant vaguely remember.
not so much for names either. i thought of the nights events.
crazy, but your apparition is evidently on my head.
you are the stature of what may get me fanatical.
well, like any person walking by; you wouldnt be my sympathy.
I laugh from all the bits and pieces. till the next party swings again.

Hate from Hell

why am I giving myself such a hard time on you?
I wanna live my life free from the repulsion of your masked face.
to forget the way your eyes look everytime we kissed.
why did I ever met you? why did I ever let myself be burned by you?
you are horror. you are pain. you are a living curse.
I pray every night from him up above to free me from this madness.
all those words spoken, like a drug bit by bit poisoning my living spirit.
you amuse yourself from our wails and pleads.
have you gone deaf? do you not hear my entireness slowly dying?
where now are your pledges of love to me? lines. just adept lines.
every step I take is another mistake to you. yet I let myself fall.
now that Im falling apart to whom shall I cry for help?
I've become so numb. so much hatred burning inside me.
tired from all these empty hopes. tired from being deceived.
can you not see how you've made me weak?
I've end up in a web of broken imaginings. claws that wont let me go.
no more cries for someone to save me. my fault. my fault.
let everything fade away in the dark. let everything be reminiscence.
I am no one to you. You were someone for me. Now, you are nothing to me.

Like a Tattoo

love is despicably addictive. pain overly gratifying.
every second is perpetual. the needle wicked.
the memory of past loves, the tears of failed relationships
like a tattoo, it lives forever.
it burns. sometimes it stings. people are masochists.
love is the needle of endless pain and suffering.
yet no matter what we say about love;
like a cycle we enjoy every minute of it.
we bleed. we learn. we move on. then here we go again.
like a tattoo, those scars remain. but they are beautifully crafted.
why?
becasue we learn from them. we are never broken.
and the lines and swirls are just memories.
of what used to be - a beautiful love story.

they. them. we will always have them. tattooed forever in our hearts.

Complimentary

no matter how many times I bleed the sentiment is pleasing.
to have loved and been loved (or at least I thought so) is happiness.
my soul free from the horrors of pain. i did everything. it just didnt work out.
now I am like a bird flying the vast blue without any restraint.
the sun shining brightly, it's warmth promising. I smile. I soar.
I cant waste time anymore. no more silly games to play.
no more lies to live by. no more secrets to hide.
If love was meant for us, It would have worked.
(or maybe for your it was never love?)
I never regretted you. I breathed those days like that of an innocent child.
my journey is long. my direction unsure. wherever the wind takes me, I'll be there.
I'll be gliding over the greens and the blues. over the citylights and over the world.